


Now or Never

by Infinity456



Category: Daredevil (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dubious Consent, Fuck Or Die, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Peter is 18, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, This is just a shameless excuse for porn ngl, but also just normal guilt, featuring matt's catholic guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-06-20 12:27:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15534228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Infinity456/pseuds/Infinity456
Summary: Matt does what he has to in order to save Peter from a Wiccan cult hellbent on using him as a virgin sacrifice.





	Now or Never

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to All_Terrain_Nerd for beta'ing!
> 
> Title is taken from the song Now or Never by Blair St. Clair.

Matt sits atop a building in Hell’s Kitchen, clad in his Daredevil suit as he takes a moment to unwind. He’d just taken down a drug cartel and it was barely past sundown, he hoped that wasn’t telling for how the rest of his night would go. He had court in the morning and was hoping this night would be a quiet one. He didn’t think Foggy would forgive him if he were late again. 

Sighing, Matt tries to push thoughts of their latest fight away. Matt knows Foggy cares, but he doesn’t understand that this is something Matt _needs_ to do, that he can’t just stop being Daredevil. People will die if he stops, and that’s unacceptable to him. He just hoped their friendship could survive Matt’s alter-ego.

Matt is contemplating turning in early when he hears it. It’s faint, far away, but he hears it. A short struggle, several people ganging up on one, it’s not long before there’s a soft thud as whoever is being attacked falls unconscious. The person is being loaded into a large vehicle and Matt is already back on his feet, following as he memorizes the victim’s heartbeat.

Matt follows them outside of Hell’s Kitchen, all the way to an abandoned warehouse on the edge of the city. He’s out of breath when he finally catches up to them, they’d been traveling fast and Matt was already worn from his previous fight. Taking a moment to catch his breath, Matt listens. It takes a moment but he’s able to locate the heartbeat he’s looking for. They’re in a room in the middle of the building, there’s no windows and several guards stationed outside the only entrance. He’s going to have to fight his way through.

Great.

Readying himself, Matt springs into action.

*

When Peter wakes up he’s lying on a concrete floor and he has a throbbing headache. He rubs his head and tries to remember how the hell he’d gotten here. He’d been visiting Ned at his dad’s place in Hell’s Kitchen, he hadn’t meant to stay so late but by the time he left to go home, it was already dark. He’d been a few blocks from the subway when a group of people had jumped out of a van and cornered him. His Spidey-Sense had been screaming at him and he didn’t have enough time to do anything before they were chanting something and he’d been hit with some ball of light.

 Sitting up, Peter takes a moment to gather himself and take in his surroundings. The room is small and mostly bare, about the size of his bedroom. There aren’t any windows and there’s only one door, with a heavy looking shelving unit next to it. Making his way to the door, Peter tries the handle but it’s locked, which he expected. However, what he isn’t expecting is not being able to force it open with his strength. Peter tries several times, but each time the door doesn’t budge. He thinks back to that ball of light that hit him, wonders if whatever it was also took his powers away.

Peter starts to immediately panic as every possibility starts going through his head. Would his powers come back? Or was this permanent? His heart was racing and his breaths were coming in short when he hears a commotion outside the door. There’s yelling and banging and what sounds like a fist fight getting progressively closer to his door. Without thinking, Peter starts banging on the door and yelling for help, he’s not sure who his kidnappers are fighting but enemy of his enemies, and all.

Finally, whoever is coming makes it to his door with what sounds like an army behind them. The door opens and none other than Daredevil comes barreling in. He shuts the door and presses his back to it as whoever behind him tries to force the door open. Thinking quickly, Peter runs to the shelving unit next to the door and starts to push. It’s heavy, and Peter doesn’t have his strength so it’s difficult but he manages to get it moving. Daredevil quickly gets what he’s doing and grabs onto the shelf from his side, pulling it towards him.

Once they get it settled in front of the door Peter collapses against the wall as Daredevil takes a breather. Peter’s feeling a little overwhelmed, he’s never actually met Daredevil before, he knows of him, and to be entirely honest he’s kind of the reason Peter avoids Hell’s Kitchen as Spider-Man. He knows Daredevil is one of the good guys, but he’s so dark and from the stories Peter’s heard, his fighting style can be quite brutal. He’s definitely a loner, and very territorial of Hell’s Kitchen in particular. For that reason, Peter always did his best to avoid Hell’s Kitchen as Spider-Man. But right now, Daredevil seemed like his only hope of getting out of here.

“Are you okay? What’s your name?” Daredevil asks him, looking in his direction.

“I-I’m Peter… and I guess? I mean I’m physically fine but I don’t really know where I am and I’m kinda freaking out here. Do you know what’s going on out there?”

The man pauses, looking uncomfortable for a moment before he answers.

“It’s some dark Wiccan cult, they’re doing a ritual tonight…” He trails off for a moment before continuing. “From what I could gather they require a virgin sacrifice.”

Daredevil is staring at him and Peter feels his face go beet red.

“H-how would they even know?!”

Daredevil lets out a humorless laugh, “A spell, apparently, virgins emit a specific ‘aura’. They just waited for the first one to walk by them.”

“Oh god…” Peter sighs, he doesn’t know what they’re going to do. Peter isn’t sure how many people are out there but he doesn’t think they can fight their way through. He doesn’t have his strength and Daredevil seemed to have been struggling on his own.

“I’m gonna get you out of here.”

“How? There’s too many to fight our way through and there’s no other way out of here!”

“Just – let me think, okay?”

The tone of his voice isn’t very reassuring and Peter is starting to feel light headed. What if they don’t get out of there? What if the Wiccans get through and take Peter away to be killed on some altar all because Peter is still a goddamn virgin _._

_Virgin._

The word is ringing in Peter’s ears over and over and it just won’t _stop_.

“Oh my god…” Peter says, suddenly realizing what they have to do. “Um, Mr. Daredevil… I think I know what we need to do.”

Peter tries to steel his nerves when Daredevil looks at him expectantly. He’s not sure how his suggestion is going to go over but they’re running out of time.

“They want to sacrifice me because I’m a v-virgin…” Taking a deep breath, Peter continues, “What if I wasn’t?”

“You’re not a virgin?” Daredevil asks, confused.

“N-no I am, I just mean that… I don’t have to be.” Peter says, hoping Daredevil would follow.

“Are you suggesting we lie to them? That won’t work, they can tell with their magic.” Daredevil says, sounding frustrated.

“No, that’s not what I mean.” Peter has to take a second to breathe, time to stop beating around the bush, Parker. “I mean that, if we had, um… s-sex, then I wouldn’t be a virgin anymore.”

Daredevil is silent and Peter tries not to freak out as he waits for a response. He really hopes Daredevil agrees because he doesn’t see another way out of this. Also, it doesn’t hurt that he’s definitely attracted to the man. Something about how dark and dangerous he is Peter finds surprisingly appealing.

“No.” Daredevil answers, final.

Peter feels suddenly very angry because this is his _life_ they’re talking about.

“Then you better have another solution because any moment they’re going to get through that door and then they’re going to _kill_ me!” Peter feels his voice almost give out at the end of his sentence. He’s feeling genuinely terrified. He hasn’t felt this vulnerable since before he had his powers and he knows he’s not going to get out of this any other way.

“We can find another way, Peter.” Daredevil tries to assure, but Peter can tell even he isn’t feeling as sure as he’s trying to sound.

“There is no other way! They’re going to _kill_ me!” Peter cries, his panic starting to overtake him.

“I can’t… not with a kid, I _can’t._ ”

“I’m not a kid!” Peter exclaims, feeling angry. “I get it, I’m young, but are you really gonna let them just _kill_ me because you can’t get past that?”

At that moment the banging on the door increases, it’s louder and the shelving unit shakes with each blow. Peter lets out a sob as he realizes how close they are to getting through. Daredevil seems to realize how little time they have as well because suddenly he’s cursing and walking towards Peter.

“Okay, okay you’re right, but if we’re doing this we need to do this _now_.” Daredevil says urgently, hands on Peter’s shoulders.

Peter nods quickly, wiping at his eyes as he realizes they’re really doing this, this is really happening.

“Okay, yeah, yeah. Let’s um, let’s do this.” Peter says, trying to talk himself into it.

It takes a moment for Peter to gather himself before he starts to shakily undress. There’s not exactly time for romance here so Peter works quickly, undoing his pants and pushing them down along with his briefs. Peter’s breathing hard as he stretches his sweatshirt to cover himself, opting to leave it on.

“I-I um, I don’t really know what to do. I’ve never done this before… obviously.” Peter laughs humorlessly as he says it.

“I know, it’ll be okay. Just lay down on your front, alright? It’ll be easier.” Daredevil promises, and Peter nods before following his instructions and lays face first on the floor, trying to ignore the continued banging on the door.

Matt tries to focus on Peter, and not the cult members outside their door. Peter is laying on the ground, stiff with nerves as Matt moves to straddle his thighs, feeling Peter tense further as he does. He takes off his gloves and rests a hand on Peter’s left hip.

“I’m sorry Peter, I’m going to try to be gentle here, but we’re short on time.”

Peter nods and Matt squeezes his hip before spitting into his hand. It’s not the best option but it’s the only one they have for lube so Matt is going to use as much as he can to make it easier on Peter. Quickly coating two fingers, Matt brings them down to Peter’s entrance. They don’t have time so Matt immediately starts with both, trying to ignore the way Peter flinches.

Peter grunts as Daredevil pushes two fingers inside of him, it’s mostly dry and very uncomfortable but he knows Matt is trying. He does his best to hide that discomfort though, afraid Matt will stop if he notices. Matt’s fingers are thrusting inside over and over at a steady pace, spreading on the outstroke each time and Peter has to squeeze his eyes shut and bite his tongue at the stretch. Daredevil probably feels guilty enough for doing this, he doesn’t need to hear Peter’s noises of discomfort.

Matt works quickly to open Peter up, trying to find a balance between efficiency and comfort. He knows he’s lost on the latter though, Peter may think he’s doing a good job at hiding his reactions but with Matt’s senses, he doesn’t stand a chance. As much as Matt wants to stop at every stifled noise, he knows they can’t. He’s about to add another finger when there’s a louder bang coming from the door, and this time, Matt can hear the hinges starting to come loose. Matt takes a breath, they’re out of time.

Quickly pulling his fingers out, Matt shoves the front of his pants down to pull his cock out. Spitting into his hand Matt slicks himself up, trying to work himself to hardness. It’s difficult, knowing this isn’t something either of them truly wants makes arousal near impossible. It takes thinking about Peter’s warmth and tightness and imagining it squeezing his cock instead of his fingers for him to get hard. Matt quickly adds more spit to Peter’s opening before lining himself up. He presses his cock to Peter’s hole and leans forward so he’s covering Peter’s body entirely with his own, wanting to shield Peter against any oncoming threats. The sound of banging is ever-present as Matt begins to press forward, sinking into Peter’s sweet heat. However, the pleasure is interrupted by the small whine Peter immediately lets out.

“Shh, it’s okay, you’re okay, you’re okay,” Matt whispers trying to reassure himself, as much as Peter. It’s difficult to keep his composure as Peter clenches tight – almost painfully so – around him.

Peter stifles a soft cry as Daredevil sinks all the way inside of him. He feels so full in a way that he never has before and he forces himself to breathe through it as Daredevil continues to shush and comfort him. The other man is thick and long and Peter wishes they’d had some actual lube because spit isn’t doing a very good job of slicking the way. Daredevil starts to move his hips and Peter lets out a pained groan. It’s a strange feeling, being emptied and filled over and over. There’s some pain, and a lot of discomfort as he’s stretched in ways he’s never been before.

Eyes clenched shut, Peter holds his breath as Daredevil sets a steady in-and-out pace. At first, his intention is to just get through it. Sure, from what he can see the other man is very attractive, but that doesn’t change that this isn’t at all how he’d wanted his first time to go. However, with each push of Matt’s hips the pain and discomfort begin to fade and Peter starts to feel a spark of something _more._ He’s not an idiot, he knows where it’s coming from, he just hadn’t realized exactly _how_ sensitive his prostate would be. Each time Matt brushes against it Peter feels it like fire spreading throughout his body.

“O-oh god, uh, ah-ah.” Peter can’t stop the noises from leaving his mouth, it feels like his breath is being punched out of him over and over, his voice climbing higher and higher as it continues.

Matt wants to hate it, he really does, but Peter is beautiful and small beneath him and impossibly tight around his cock. The boy is shivering beneath him as Matt moves his hips, letting out little _ah-ah-ahs_ as Matt goes. He’s pulling almost all the way out before pushing back inside each time, unable to stop his own moans at the sweet drag of Peter’s body along his cock with each movement.

The heat is building between them and Matt really wishes he’d taken off more of his costume before starting but he’d wanted to be ready to fight at a moment’s notice. It occurs to him at that moment that technically speaking, Peter is no longer a virgin and they may be able to stop. For a moment, Matt considers it, but then he worries it may not count for the cult if they don’t finish. It’s best to play it safe, Matt decides, so he continues and picks up his pace, enjoying the way Peter’s voice gets louder as he does. It starts as soft moans that gradually build with each thrust until they’re near constant. Matt himself is panting heavily as he starts to feel warmth build in his lower belly as Peter starts to push back to meet him thrust for thrust. At that moment, the only noise Matt is aware of are the sound of their combined moans coupled with the rhythmic _slap-slap-slap_ of skin on skin.

_“His aura has changed, we can’t use him anymore. We’ll have to wait for the next moon.”_

Matt hears it, he does, but he doesn’t register it, can’t think past the pleasure currently taking over his body. Peter is whining over and over beneath him and Matt is relishing every moment of it as he purposefully angles his hips to hit Peter’s sweet spot on every thrust.

“Oh god, oh-oh god. Please, please…” Peter whines, wanting so much more.

“I’m here, sweetheart, I’m here.” Matt moans into Peter’s ear, wanting to reassure him as he reaches around to palm Peter’s hard cock.

Peter’s body feels like it’s on fire and he never knew he could feel this incredible. He’s moving his hips along with Daredevil’s, though he isn’t certain if he’s trying to push back onto his cock or forward into his fist. It all feels so amazing but he wants more, _needs_ more. Turning his head so that he’s looking over his left shoulder, Peter reaches back and wraps his arm behind Daredevil’s neck to pull him in. Peter’s not really thinking as he pulls the man in for a kiss, he just wants to feel as close to Daredevil as he can possibly get.

Matt groans as his lips meet Peter’s, his lips are soft and a touch awkward as Matt deepens the kiss. Slipping his tongue inside Peter’s warm mouth, Matt swallows Peter’s adorable little whimper as his tongue seeks Peter’s out. He starts to thrust faster as he sucks Peter’s tongue into his own mouth and almost loses his rhythm as Peter gives a full body shake beneath him.

Daredevil is stroking his cock fast, fist tight as his cock pounds into his prostate and Peter feels out of breath, his body shaking with pleasure. Peter feels _good_ , he doesn’t know where Daredevil ends and he begins and he doesn’t ever want this feeling to end. Suddenly, their kiss breaks as Peter’s upper body collapses to the ground, climax overtaking him as he hurtles over the cliff, cock spurting over the other Man’s fist as he cries out his pleasure.

Peter’s body grows suddenly tight, clamping down around Matt’s cock as he reaches his climax. Rearing back, Matt takes hold of his hips and pulls his hips back as he fucks Peter with uncontrolled thrusts, barely pulling out before pushing back in. He’s _so_ close, and Peter feels so good that it isn’t long before Matt is shouting his own release as he finally follows Peter over the edge and into the abyss.

Peter moans as the other man’s cock swells within him, flooding him with warmth as the man’s thrusts become frantic. It feels like it lasts forever that he’s held in Daredevil’s tight grip and he knows there’s going to be bruises on his hips in the morning; a part of him hopes that they last. It feels like forever before the other man’s grip releases and Peter sinks back down to the floor, Daredevil following him, almost collapsing on top of Peter before rolling to the side at the last minute.

Matt’s breaths come in heavy as he slowly comes down from his post-orgasm haze. He feels loose and languid as he tries to remind himself why they did this in the first place. He jerks forward and focuses his senses on the door, realizing there’s no longer anyone trying to get in. Expanding his senses, Matt isn’t able to detect _anyone_ , and that’s when he remembers what he heard but hadn’t been able to focus on at the time.

They left, the cult members were gone.

Matt wasn’t sure whether to feel relieved or angry. He’s not sure if he’s angry at himself for continuing when he should’ve stopped, or angry that the cult members got away. Both, probably. Matt turns towards Peter and gathers himself enough to use his senses to take him in. Peter’s limp on the ground, breathing harsh but beginning to slow. His heartrate is still on the fast side but is also slowly coming down. There’s a hint of blood in the air, not a lot, but Matt still picks up on it, he’d tried to be gentle but without proper lubricant it was inevitable. Still, knowing there was no way to avoid it doesn’t stop the shame from overtaking him.

“Hey, are you okay?” Matt asks quietly as he quickly tucks himself back inside his pants. Propping himself up on one arm, Matt turns to face Peter and reaches out to touch his shoulder.

“I– yeah, yes. That was, um, really, um…wow.” Peter breathes, not sure any of that was even halfway coherent. Then again, he’d just had his brains fucked out of him by Hell’s Kitchen’s resident devil-themed vigilante so he thinks he can be forgiven.

Matt tries not to laugh, Peter is taking this surprisingly well. Unfortunately, it doesn’t stop the guilt from blooming in his chest when he remembers how they got here. Peter enjoying it doesn’t change that they hadn’t had a choice. This was rape, and Matt could have stopped once he’d heard the cult members leave. But he hadn’t, he’d continued instead and Matt isn’t sure he’ll ever be able to forgive himself for it.

“Oh hey, I don’t hear them at the door anymore,” Peter says, suddenly registering the lack of noise from the hallway.

“They’re gone,” Matt says, hoping Peter won’t question just how he knows. “It should be safe for us to leave now.”

Peter breathes a sigh of relief, crisis averted. Now, as long as his powers came back he’d be okay... if they came back. He tries not to dwell on that. Reaching for his pants, Peter quickly shoves them on, face heating as Daredevil’s come starts to leak out of him. Pants on, Peter stands and looks over at the other man who seems to be studying him intensely.

“Um, I-I don’t really know what to say… thank you for, you know, saving my life?”

“Don’t, please.” Daredevil says, seeming uncomfortable.

Peter nods and together they move the shelving unit and exit the room, Daredevil leading the way with a hand on Peter’s lower back. They silently navigate the hallways of the warehouse and Peter tries to hide his slight limp but he knows he’s unsuccessful when Daredevil keeps trying to support some of his weight like he’s afraid Peter’s going to fall over any minute.

Matt feels a stab of guilt with each falter in Peter’s step as they walk the halls. He tries to stay close to Peter as they walk, hand pressed firm to Peter’s back. He’s worried for Peter, right now he seems okay, but he’s just been through a traumatic experience and it may not be hitting him now but it likely would later. He just hopes Peter has someone who would help him through it. Matt couldn’t focus too much on that, he needed to spend however long it took to find the cult members before the next full moon, he couldn’t let this happen to anyone else again.

They make it to the street and Peter gives an awkward goodbye as he starts to walk away. Before he can get very far, Daredevil stops him, “Peter, at least let me walk you home.” The other man offers.

At first, Peter wants to refuse, worried about Daredevil knowing where Spider-Man lives before he remembers Daredevil doesn’t know he’s Spider-Man. Also, Peter isn’t entirely sure where he is and it’s not like he has money for a cab right now. Not to mention that without his powers he’s particularly vulnerable right now and walking the streets of New York defenseless at this time of night wouldn’t be his wisest decision.

The walk to Peter’s apartment is long and mostly quiet. Peter can tell that Daredevil feels guilty about what happened and Peter wishes he could reassure him in some way but Peter is too stuck in his head to say much of anything. He can’t stop thinking about what happened and he knows he should be upset, but he’s not. If they hadn’t done what they did, Peter might be dead on some altar right now, but more than that, –  and as guilty as Peter feels about it – he actually enjoyed having sex with Daredevil and a part of him wishes it could happen again. The thought has Peter’s face warming and Peter doesn’t know what he’ll do if he ever comes across Daredevil as Spider-Man.

Thank god for masks and secret identities.

When they arrive at Peter’s apartment they say an awkward goodbye, Peter wants to say something more but he’s at a loss for words. Before he goes, Daredevil reassures him that he’ll find the people responsible and ensure they face consequences for their actions. The way he says it, with an intensity Peter’s never seen anyone pull off, Peter believes he will. A part of him almost feels bad for the people involved with his kidnapping. Almost.

*

It’s been three weeks since the incident, as Peter likes to refer to it, and Peter still can’t stop thinking about it. It took about a day before Peter’s powers came back and he’d never been so relieved in his life. Spider-Man has become such a part of who he is that losing that would feel like losing a limb. The first thing he tried to do was track down the cult members, only to find that they’d already been taken care of by Daredevil. Peter wasn’t sure how the man worked so fast, but he was grateful. Ever since, he’s been taking full advantage of his powers being back and going out as Spider-Man as much as he could.

Like right now, Peter is swinging along the streets of Queens, so far he’s managed to thwart two muggings and a car-jacking. Stopping on top of a building close to his apartment, Peter is just considering going home when he hears someone in the alley below. Looking over, Peter is surprised to find none other than Daredevil in the alley. He’s surprised to see him outside of Hell’s Kitchen but judging by the man tied up on the ground and the crying woman it looks as though he’s bagged his own perp.

Peter watches as Daredevil stays with the woman while she calls the police. He stays with her until they arrive before he slips into the darkness and Peter follows. He waits until they get a little further from the cops until he drops down to the ground behind the other man. He’s surprised by Daredevil’s seeming lack of surprise, but is taken even more off guard when he finds his back shoved into the brick wall of the nearest building.

“Ouch, I swear the stuff they write in the Bugle isn’t true, Horn-head! Or is this just how you greet all your fellow vigilantes?” Peter tries to joke, surprised by Daredevil’s reaction to him.

Daredevil seems genuinely angry and Peter doesn’t understand why, they’ve never met before – that Daredevil knows of anyway. Physically, Peter knows Daredevil is no match for him, but the way he’s towering over Peter and holding him firmly against the wall has his brain sending mixed signals throughout his traitorous body. He really, _really_ , shouldn’t be enjoying this position. His thoughts are still reeling when Daredevil finally breaks his silence.

“You had enhanced strength that entire time and didn’t use it?”

Peter’s eyes widen behind his mask in disbelief. How could he possibly know who Peter is? It doesn’t make sense and any arousal Peter felt moments before instantly leaves his body as panic takes its place. One of the good ones or not, anyone knowing his identity is dangerous and the thought of it falling into the wrong hands terrifies him. 

“I-I didn’t… my powers were _gone_ that night! H-how do you _know?_ ” Daredevil’s grip loosens, but stays, keeping Peter pressed to the wall for the time being.  

“Your powers were gone?” He asks, ignoring Peter’s question.

“Y-yes… whatever they did to me took them away a-and they didn’t come back until the next day.”

Daredevil holds him there, head cocked to the side as if he’s listening closely for something. After a moment, the other man nods stiffly before releasing Peter and turning away.

“Wait! You can’t just leave! How do you know who I am?! Do others know? I can’t… I have _family_.” Peter cries, feeling the panic take over as he imagines his identity being sold to the highest bidder. His mind flashes to thoughts of the Kingpin sending one of his goons to his home only for them to find May. Oh god... Peter needs to get to May. She could be in danger right _now._

Suddenly there are arms wrapping around him, pulling him into a seated position on the ground. His back is against a solid chest, strong arms wrapped around his body, pinning his own to his sides. There’s a voice in his ear instructing him to breathe but he can’t stop shaking.

Matt pulls Peter tight to his chest as the younger boy gasps for air. He’d had to stop the moment he heard the panic in Peter’s voice, immediately recognizing the signs of an oncoming panic attack. He keeps up a steady stream of quiet dialogue in Peter’s ear, trying to comfort him as best as he can. He understands Peter’s sudden panic, he’s a vigilante who’s racked up an impressive list of enemies, including some of Matt’s own. If his identity got out, anyone he cares about would be in danger, it’s the same fear Matt has any time someone else learns who he is.

“I can’t… I can’t. M-my aunt, I gotta…” Peter is saying between gasps for air.

“Sh, you’re okay Peter, I promise. No one else knows who you are, just me.”

“H-how?” Peter gasps, he still doesn’t understand _how_ he knows.

“It’s… complicated.” Is all Daredevil says, arms still wrapped tight around Peter.

“Then _un_ -complicate it.”

There’s a tense silence as the other man seemingly contemplates telling Peter how he knows his identity. Peter’s starting to think he’ll never tell when he lets out a sigh and what follows has got to be the strangest explanation Peter has ever heard.

“I have enhanced hearing abilities… I can hear your heartbeat – I can hear anyone’s heartbeat – and each one is unique.”

“You can _hear_ my heartbeat?” Peter asks in disbelief.

“Yes… it’s also how I know you were telling the truth earlier about your powers.”

“You can tell when people are lying?”

“Yes,” Daredevil confirms.

“Oh...” Peter sighs, unsure of what else to say.

The moment stretches, both of them silent as Peter processes this information. When Daredevil shifts underneath him Peter remembers he’s still sitting in the other man’s lap. He knows he should probably move but it feels really nice, comforting even. It’s silly, but they’ve had _sex_ and even though he knows it was meaningless to Daredevil, he can’t help feeling a strange closeness to the other man.

“What’s your name?” Peter asks, knowing there’s a chance he won’t get an answer. “I-it’s just that you know mine, a-and you’ve like, seen me n-naked, and, um, been _inside_ of me and I don’t even know your name…”

There’s a moment of silence, and then, “My name is Matthew.” Daredevil says quietly.

“Matthew,” Peter says, testing the sound of it on his lips.

They’re both quiet for a long moment, neither seeming to know what to say. Matt seems stuck in his head, thinking something over, and Peter is surprised when he’s the one to break the silence.

“Peter, I need to apologize to you for what happened back in that warehouse. I shoul–”

“You don’t need to apologize for saving my life,” Peter insists.

“I do,” Matt is quick to assert. “I heard them leave when they realized what was happening, I could’ve stopped earlier but I didn’t. Peter, I just… I remember hearing it, but I didn’t register it until after. I am so sorry for that.”

Peter can hear the guilt in Matt’s voice and realizes he’s been struggling with this since that night. He feels some surprise at the revelation but he doesn’t feel any anger. Ever since that night, Peter hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Matt and about how much he wished it could happen again.

“Don’t be, because um… I’m not.” Peter says, voice dropping to a whisper. “I know it didn’t mean anything but I-I haven’t been able to stop thinking about that night…”

Matt can’t think of a response, because the truth is he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it either. The day after it all went down he’d looked into Peter, mainly to be sure he was okay, but also because Peter sounded incredibly young and Matt needed to know he hadn’t just forced himself on a fifteen-year-old. Not that it made what he did any better, but he’d been relieved to find Peter had turned eighteen two months prior. However, knowing Peter was eighteen made it difficult for Matt to tell himself he _shouldn’t_ think about him.

Now, knowing exactly who Peter is, and that he’d _enjoyed_ sex with Matt – if not the circumstances – Matt can’t stop his mind from spiraling. He hasn’t been able to get close to anyone romantically since becoming Daredevil, but who could better understand his lifestyle than a fellow vigilante?

He must have been quiet too long because suddenly Peter is getting out of Matt’s lap. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, please just – just forget I said that, okay?”

Peter sounds embarrassed and upset, and that’s the last thing Matt wants.

“Peter, just, wait,” Matt says, standing with Peter and holding onto Peter’s arm. “Don’t be upset, please. This… isn’t easy for me.”

“It’s not easy for me either! We had _sex_. And, I know how it happened wasn’t okay but it just, it felt _good_ and a part of me just wishes it had been under different circumstances so I wouldn’t feel so fucking horrible for enjoying it.” Peter says, and Matt can taste the salt in the air from Peter’s tears.

Matt can’t help wrestling with his own feelings about this and his own attraction to Peter. He was so young, but he was a vigilante, like him, and if Matt’s memory is correct, Spider-Man came on the scene around the time Peter would’ve been just fifteen. He may only be eighteen but he’d taken on more responsibility then any eighteen-year-old Matt had ever known.

“Peter, you have no reason to feel guilty here, what happened, it wasn’t your fault.”

“I know that! I know it wasn’t my fault that it happened but it’s my fault for enjoying it, f-for wanting it to happen again. I-I don’t even know what you look like! Or if your name is really even Matt. I just… I feel like such an idi–”

Not letting himself think too much about it, Matt reaches up and slides the cowl off his head, knowing what he needs to do for Peter to trust him. Peter immediately goes silent and Matt feels like his heart might beat out of his chest. He can’t stop himself from thinking that Peter might not find him attractive. He knows that, based on the reactions of others, that he is an attractive person, however, that doesn’t mean _Peter_ will find him attractive.

“Wow,” Peter breathes, “I– why?”

“I think it’s time we even the playing field, don’t you?” Matt asks rhetorically. It turns out he needn’t have worried about Peter being attracted to him, because Peter’s breath is hitching, his heart rate has increased slightly and he can’t stop staring at Matt. “Matt Murdock,” Matt introduces himself, reaching his arm out and offering his hand to Peter.

A warm hand slips into his own with a firm grip, “Peter.”

“It’s nice to meet you, officially, Peter.”

Peter shakes Matt’s hand, feeling light as he studies Matt’s face. It takes a moment for Peter to realize that while Matt is looking in his direction, he isn’t looking _at_ him. His eyes are unfocused and seem like they’re looking _through_ Peter rather than at him.

“A-are you, um, you’re–“

“Blind, yes.” Matt chuckles, he can tell Peter isn’t trying to be offensive, just surprised.

“That’s so cool!” Peter exclaims, and then immediately backtracks, “I-I mean not that you’re blind – not that that’s bad or any – nevermind. I just mean that you can, like, fight the way you do! I, just, _how_?”

It’s adorable, Matt thinks of Peter’s enthusiasm, and it has him fighting a smile as he answers Peter’s barely formed question.

“When I lost my sight, the rest of my senses heightened to a point where seeing was no longer necessary,” Matt says, it’s the simplest way he can explain it and he hopes it’s good enough for Peter. At least for now.

“That is so cool,” Peter says, breathless. There’s a moment’s pause where Peter seems to realize he’s still holding Matt’s hand and he quickly let's go, awkward once more. “I, um, I guess I just, I’m not really sure where we go from here. O-or even where you’re interested in going from here.” Peter admits.

Matt considers for a moment, what _does_ he want? He thinks he knows, but he doesn’t know if he can _allow_ himself to have it. Since becoming Daredevil, Matt hasn’t been able to connect with others on a romantic level for fear of them learning his secret or putting them in danger. But Peter not only knows his identity now, but he’s a vigilante as well, more than capable of defending himself if necessary.

So, knowing that his usual worries don’t apply here, the only question Matt has to ask himself is if he _wants_ Peter. Matt may not be able to see him but he knows Peter is beautiful, physically, yes, but even more than that he’s followed Spider-Man’s work for some time now and is aware of how much good the other man does and how much he cares about his city. As much as he tries, he can’t stop himself from considering their meeting. He’s been _inside_ of Peter, and forced as it was, he couldn’t deny the physical chemistry they had. He feels like this is an opportunity to connect with someone in a way he’s limited with others. It helps that despite his age – which Matt is still struggling with – Peter is someone Matt is actually _interested_ in possibly getting to know. From the little research he’d done into Peter after their initial meeting, Matt knows he’s intelligent, thoughtful, and caring; someone Matt could really enjoy being around. Making his decision, Matt reaches out with both hands and cups Peter’s upper arms where they hang at his sides.

“If you would like, I was thinking we could start with coffee, and go from there.”

Peter reaches up to pull off his mask and smiles, letting himself relax for the first time since he saw Matt earlier that night. Lowering his face, and laughing softly, Peter gives Matt his answer, “I think it's perfect.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to check me out on tumblr!
> 
> Spidey-stuff


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